Part 2

....I was sitting at the bar when he walked in. I was gross, hadn't showered, hat on, hair in braids...feeling really uneasy. Luckily, the Coors Light tasted good because if it hadn't, I would have bolted. I didn't even remember what he looked like for sure. Very strange. Then in he walked. And we just clicked. The first words he said referred to how BEAUTIFUL I was....wow...I hadn't heard my own husband use those words for months. It was a nice night -- hours of conversation. And I headed home with butterflies in my stomach.

....Which quickly turned into dread. Pulling into the driveway, and back into reality, I snuggled up on my couch and had dreams of a happier time. Joel got up in the middle of the night and went thru my phone....I can't say I blame him for being upset. I did meet up with another guy, afterall, but I was actually surprised at how angry he was. In one way it almost made me feel good -- like "wow, deep down in there, he does care" but I know Joel and I know that it's merely his competitive streak that got him to the place he was in. And that just made me cry.

Joel moved out the next day. He moved in with my brother for a few days (more about family and friends betrayal later) -- and then to an extended stay hotel. I had no doubt that he would not be coming back. Months of fighting went by -- he was getting uglier and uglier. Justin and I were growing closer and closer. He was filling a void in my life. For every bad thing that Joel did or say -- that anyone did or say -- Justin would say or do something 10 fold to get me thru it.

At the beginning, Justin and I made a pact that we were NO RELATIONSHIP people. We just wanted to be close. He and I both needed someone positive to talk to -- someone to help build us up and not tear us down. THAT is what he fulfilled for me....and I thank God for him.

Costa Rica loomed....Our best friends were getting married and Joel and I had made our reservations a year prior....we decided we could both go.... It was simply not an option for either one of us to miss one of the happiest days in our best friends' lives. Justin was worried about me going -- we'd had a few exchanges with Joel that were extremely ugly -- one in which the police were called out to my house because Joel locked me out. He was constantly calling me names -- putting me down. No one understood why Justin was in my life...why I needed him there. My friends and family were very hopeful that the shores of Costa Rica would bring Joel and I to a place of love again...Pura Vida, right? Well.....maybe not.....

(to be continued)