In an effort to avoid studying some more...I thought I'd write.

I'm feeling pretty peaceful as of late. It's a nice change. For awhile there I was out of control. I was letting myself get bogged down in negativity -- and other people's problems. That's just too much. I have some really good things going on in my life right now. I'm praying that I get that new job at work and that it actually FITS into my family. The money is better, the hours will be different, but perhaps better and I need a change. I am so grateful that my director thought of me. There is so much said in that. They respect me and desire my employment. For that...and many things...I am blessed.

I am pretty at peace with the fact that I am probably not going to pass this block, but am now able to look to the future. I will be a nurse; it just may not be within the time frame that I had originally planned. But, you know what? That's the thing...some things you just CANT plan on. You have to somehow reach deep inside you and find a way to keep on ticking. It's called resilience. It's not always easy, but it's always easier.

I've been seeking out special moments each day. I mean, really looking for moments where things all fit into place. They can be little (Cole cuddling on the couch with me) or they can be large (I got a bonus at work!) Take for instance, yesterday. Justin and I made a wonderful dinner (artichoke to start then steak and potato topped off with a fantastic bottle of red wine.) It was delicious. Conversation was lovely. And, it cleared my mind. Then we cuddled up on the couch and watched tv...when Justin noticed it was 9:11pm. He turned off the tv and asked to be quiet. I knew why. 9-11. I thought about those I know affected by that horrible day -- Wayne and his family, Fred and his family, and so very many others. That minute seemed long. Quiet. I loved it. I need to seek out these moments because they are there -- all around us and we let them fly by in our hurry to do something else or bitch about something else. It's a shame.

So for today -- take the initiative to look at the blessings in our lives. Of course it's our family -- our friends -- but what about the beauty of flower, the light breeze, a light touch, the thought of a friend, making the green light, or passing that psych test.

...well, I'm not perfect either....and there is beauty in that as well. *wink*

(oh, and edited to add...100 days of Obama in office.....100 days...got this text today -- hilarious: So years ago they use to say "a Black man as our President???" "When pigs fly" -- 100 days into the damn thing and we get hit with the swine flu.... come on...it's funny, a little.)