On COPS, an inmate explaining the series of events that landed him in jail:
"...I stabbed him and he died. I ain't mean to kill him. But he died."
Doesn't it just suck when things like that just happen?
Monday, August 08, 2005
Friday, August 05, 2005
Well someone give me a Hallelujah!!! I'm a Televangelist!
Televangelist
You are 14% Rational, 71% Extroverted, 28% Brutal, and 71% Arrogant.
As the Lord as my witness, I swear upon the good book that you are indeed the TELEVANGELIST! Characterized by extreme arrogance, self-assurance, and extroversion, you would make a very charismatic leader (or a very despotic one). On top of that, you are also more intuitive than rational, predisposing you to a more spiritual or emotional outlook on life. Thus, you are thoroughly irrational. You also tend to be rather gentle and considerate of others' feelings. Clearly, you would make the perfect televangelist. Emotional, extroverted, arrogant, and gentle, you annoy the hell out of people who have to listen to the feel-good, intuitive shit spewing from your mouth. Not only that, but people may look down on you as a self-centered asshat. So while you are gentle and genuinely care about others, it is quite clear that you still care about yourself MORE. Why is your personality flawed? Because you are too damned extroverted, emotional, and arrogant. So preach your irrational message, brotha-man! I assure you, no one will be listening!
To put it less negatively:
1. You are more INTUITIVE than rational.
2. You are more EXTROVERTED than introverted.
3. You are more GENTLE than brutal.
4. You are more ARROGANT than humble.
Compatibility:
Your exact opposite is the Spiteful Loner.
Other personalities you would probably get along with are the Hippie, the Starving Artist, and the Robot.
*
*
If you scored near fifty percent for a certain trait (42%-58%), you could very well go either way. For example, someone with 42% Extroversion is slightly leaning towards being an introvert, but is close enough to being an extrovert to be classified that way as well. Below is a list of the other personality types so that you can determine which other possible categories you may fill if you scored near fifty percent for certain traits.
The other personality types:
The Emo Kid: Intuitive, Introverted, Gentle, Humble.
The Starving Artist: Intuitive, Introverted, Gentle, Arrogant.
The Bitch-Slap: Intuitive, Introverted, Brutal, Humble.
The Brute: Intuitive, Introverted, Brutal, Arrogant.
The Hippie: Intuitive, Extroverted, Gentle, Humble.
The Televangelist: Intuitive, Extroverted, Gentle, Arrogant.
The Schoolyard Bully: Intuitive, Extroverted, Brutal, Humble.
The Class Clown: Intuitive, Extroverted, Brutal, Arrogant.
The Robot: Rational, Introverted, Gentle, Humble.
The Haughty Intellectual: Rational, Introverted, Gentle, Arrogant.
The Spiteful Loner: Rational, Introverted, Brutal, Humble.
The Sociopath: Rational, Introverted, Brutal, Arrogant.
The Hand-Raiser: Rational, Extroverted, Gentle, Humble.
The Braggart: Rational, Extroverted, Gentle, Arrogant.
The Capitalist Pig: Rational, Extroverted, Brutal, Humble.
The Smartass: Rational, Extroverted, Brutal, Arrogant.
My test tracked 4 variables How you compared to other people your age and gender:
You scored higher than 3% on Rationality
You scored higher than 75% on Extroversion
You scored higher than 21% on Brutality
You scored higher than 82% on Arrogance
The Personality Defect Test
http://www.okcupid.com/tests/take?testid=4741219933576750506
I give that a big fat whateva!
You are 14% Rational, 71% Extroverted, 28% Brutal, and 71% Arrogant.
As the Lord as my witness, I swear upon the good book that you are indeed the TELEVANGELIST! Characterized by extreme arrogance, self-assurance, and extroversion, you would make a very charismatic leader (or a very despotic one). On top of that, you are also more intuitive than rational, predisposing you to a more spiritual or emotional outlook on life. Thus, you are thoroughly irrational. You also tend to be rather gentle and considerate of others' feelings. Clearly, you would make the perfect televangelist. Emotional, extroverted, arrogant, and gentle, you annoy the hell out of people who have to listen to the feel-good, intuitive shit spewing from your mouth. Not only that, but people may look down on you as a self-centered asshat. So while you are gentle and genuinely care about others, it is quite clear that you still care about yourself MORE. Why is your personality flawed? Because you are too damned extroverted, emotional, and arrogant. So preach your irrational message, brotha-man! I assure you, no one will be listening!
To put it less negatively:
1. You are more INTUITIVE than rational.
2. You are more EXTROVERTED than introverted.
3. You are more GENTLE than brutal.
4. You are more ARROGANT than humble.
Compatibility:
Your exact opposite is the Spiteful Loner.
Other personalities you would probably get along with are the Hippie, the Starving Artist, and the Robot.
*
*
If you scored near fifty percent for a certain trait (42%-58%), you could very well go either way. For example, someone with 42% Extroversion is slightly leaning towards being an introvert, but is close enough to being an extrovert to be classified that way as well. Below is a list of the other personality types so that you can determine which other possible categories you may fill if you scored near fifty percent for certain traits.
The other personality types:
The Emo Kid: Intuitive, Introverted, Gentle, Humble.
The Starving Artist: Intuitive, Introverted, Gentle, Arrogant.
The Bitch-Slap: Intuitive, Introverted, Brutal, Humble.
The Brute: Intuitive, Introverted, Brutal, Arrogant.
The Hippie: Intuitive, Extroverted, Gentle, Humble.
The Televangelist: Intuitive, Extroverted, Gentle, Arrogant.
The Schoolyard Bully: Intuitive, Extroverted, Brutal, Humble.
The Class Clown: Intuitive, Extroverted, Brutal, Arrogant.
The Robot: Rational, Introverted, Gentle, Humble.
The Haughty Intellectual: Rational, Introverted, Gentle, Arrogant.
The Spiteful Loner: Rational, Introverted, Brutal, Humble.
The Sociopath: Rational, Introverted, Brutal, Arrogant.
The Hand-Raiser: Rational, Extroverted, Gentle, Humble.
The Braggart: Rational, Extroverted, Gentle, Arrogant.
The Capitalist Pig: Rational, Extroverted, Brutal, Humble.
The Smartass: Rational, Extroverted, Brutal, Arrogant.
My test tracked 4 variables How you compared to other people your age and gender:
You scored higher than 3% on Rationality
You scored higher than 75% on Extroversion
You scored higher than 21% on Brutality
You scored higher than 82% on Arrogance
The Personality Defect Test
http://www.okcupid.com/tests/take?testid=4741219933576750506
I give that a big fat whateva!
Sometimes you just gotta laugh...
''I saw a woman wearing a sweatshirt with "Guess" on it.
so, I said, "Thyroid problem?''
Ok, if you didn't laugh something is wrong with you.....
so, I said, "Thyroid problem?''
Ok, if you didn't laugh something is wrong with you.....
Thursday, August 04, 2005
"Mom, I have to go poop on the potty"
*sigh*
"Mom."
When did Cole become big enough to call me "Mom?" I think I should forever be "Mommy"...Well, until he is reaches that magic age and it turns creepy. Aw, but he's only TWO...Not even 2 1/2, just 2. I am not ready for this.
So, anyway, we're fully entrenched in this potty "training" nonsense. We decided to bypass the baby potty for the real deal. Cole has decided he is too big to sit to pee, afterall he wants to pee like big brother, Dane and Daddy. (Again, "mom" gets the shaft) I tried to tell him that sitting down works just as well. I relunctantly decided to seize the opportunity and show the dear child. Kids learn by example, right? So, I sit down, do my duty and say "see Cole, you CAN sit and pee!" Well, this conversation quickly backfires when he is truly concerned that my pee is yellow and his isn't. Ugh.
We have big boy underwear and a Dora "I did it, I did it, Hooray!" poop chart. I walked into my bedroom the other day to find literally dozens of glittery, obnoxious colored "fishy" stickers ALL OVER my footboard on my bed. Beautiful.
...And while "dad" and I were getting those off, he decides to go potty again and try to wipe himself. Lucky for my sweet boy, I had just put a new roll of toilet paper on the roll. He proceeds to unravel it all into one gigantic heap on the floor. I suppose its better than putting it all in the toilet, flushing it, only to have the toilet bubble over with CLEAR pee and poop everywhere, like he did yesterday, right? I am beginning to really doubt this potty "training" BS...as I patiently re-roll the entire thing back on the roll (now that's puuurrrty)...
So today, he is running around naked...We've had one accident and one "I swear you did it to torment me" pee. But we've had success too...
...And he just ran out, exclaiming with glee, "Mom, Look!" He grabbed me by the hand, and in all his naked glory, showed me a toilet bowl filled with yellow pee.
"Mom"
*sigh*
"Mom."
When did Cole become big enough to call me "Mom?" I think I should forever be "Mommy"...Well, until he is reaches that magic age and it turns creepy. Aw, but he's only TWO...Not even 2 1/2, just 2. I am not ready for this.
So, anyway, we're fully entrenched in this potty "training" nonsense. We decided to bypass the baby potty for the real deal. Cole has decided he is too big to sit to pee, afterall he wants to pee like big brother, Dane and Daddy. (Again, "mom" gets the shaft) I tried to tell him that sitting down works just as well. I relunctantly decided to seize the opportunity and show the dear child. Kids learn by example, right? So, I sit down, do my duty and say "see Cole, you CAN sit and pee!" Well, this conversation quickly backfires when he is truly concerned that my pee is yellow and his isn't. Ugh.
We have big boy underwear and a Dora "I did it, I did it, Hooray!" poop chart. I walked into my bedroom the other day to find literally dozens of glittery, obnoxious colored "fishy" stickers ALL OVER my footboard on my bed. Beautiful.
...And while "dad" and I were getting those off, he decides to go potty again and try to wipe himself. Lucky for my sweet boy, I had just put a new roll of toilet paper on the roll. He proceeds to unravel it all into one gigantic heap on the floor. I suppose its better than putting it all in the toilet, flushing it, only to have the toilet bubble over with CLEAR pee and poop everywhere, like he did yesterday, right? I am beginning to really doubt this potty "training" BS...as I patiently re-roll the entire thing back on the roll (now that's puuurrrty)...
So today, he is running around naked...We've had one accident and one "I swear you did it to torment me" pee. But we've had success too...
...And he just ran out, exclaiming with glee, "Mom, Look!" He grabbed me by the hand, and in all his naked glory, showed me a toilet bowl filled with yellow pee.
"Mom"
*sigh*
Wednesday, August 03, 2005
Rain on the Brain
"Put away your worries, the world is a good and perfect place.
It is in fact very easy."
~Fenchurch Douglas Adams~
So Long and Thanks for All the Fish
I fell asleep last night to the sounds of thunder and the flash of lightening. A monsoon storm whipping with fury while I lay in my bed. It was a slice of heaven. Those moments make me think and I like thinking.
I have an easy life. I have a good life. I have healthy children and a healthy marriage. I live in a great house, have 2 great (albeit, slightly neurotic) dogs. My parents are alive and still married. I am close with my family. I have a large group of close friends. I am in that bracket of not having enough money to stay out of debt, but having enough to do almost anything I really want to. I'm simple, and I don't wish for much.
I'm grateful.
It is in fact very easy."
~Fenchurch Douglas Adams~
So Long and Thanks for All the Fish
I fell asleep last night to the sounds of thunder and the flash of lightening. A monsoon storm whipping with fury while I lay in my bed. It was a slice of heaven. Those moments make me think and I like thinking.
I have an easy life. I have a good life. I have healthy children and a healthy marriage. I live in a great house, have 2 great (albeit, slightly neurotic) dogs. My parents are alive and still married. I am close with my family. I have a large group of close friends. I am in that bracket of not having enough money to stay out of debt, but having enough to do almost anything I really want to. I'm simple, and I don't wish for much.
I'm grateful.
Tuesday, August 02, 2005
Dane's in Kindergarten
Dane’s in Kindergarten…..
I woke up this morning feeling like it was MY first day of something very important. I decided to shower and jump into the day with both feet. In the shower my mind wondered to my birth with Dane. I remember it all so very well and I felt almost overcome with emotion while I was washing the conditioner out of my hair.
I opened the door and found Dane snuggled in bed with his daddy. The clock read 6:44am. Dane knows that he is not supposed to come out of his room until 7:00am. (A trick I claim helps him "learn time" all the while helps me catch some zzzz's.) I am a bit annoyed and a bit in awe that such a beautiful human being was created by his daddy and me. I decided to let them sleep.
Soon, the chaos started, Cole woke up followed quickly by Dane. Breakfast was served (donuts and blueberries, as I'm sure you were wondering) the dogs needed feeding; the fish needed feeding, and all the other hustle and bustle that happens in the morning in our home. You see, this is pretty much a normal day -- with one HUGE exception.
Dane is going to Kindergarten.
Paling in comparison to my child starting school, the space shuttle launch is on the TV. Recognizing the amazement of sending another shuttle into space, while not ignoring the ironic parallel to my life, we all stop what we are doing and all watch this glorious event.
Then it is time to load up the backpack, and head out the door.
The drive there was fast...how can the minutes disappear into seconds? We parked, got out of the car...and with daddy's hand in his; he heads off to his future.
Waiting for the door to open brought all kinds of anxiety. Dane was just fine, his brother was clingy. I was about to swell up in memories, when I saw Keegan rounding the corner. I just sat and watched them for one second, excited to be here together, and showing each other their backpacks -- The Packers and The Fantastic Four...
It was quite a moment -- which lasted all of 2 seconds -- when Mrs. Dawson opened the door and let them come in. This woman will be in charge of my child's safety and education in the year to come. This woman, who was blocking the doorway and not letting me in, was Dane's Kindergarten teacher. He will always remember her...as I remember Ms. Potito (I just went off on a slight tangent, sorry...delete delete delete….getting back on track….so back to her blocking me at the door like a lineman...) in my pathetic state I ask for ONE more picture, to which this gracious woman allows.
We blow one kiss....and his journey begins.......and my journey home, in a bundle of sweet tears with a simple smile, makes me feel proud and honored to be the mom to Dane -- a Kindergartener.
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