The holiday is certainly not what it use to be. Have you noticed how desperately sad and lonely some people feel on major holidays? Man, I sure felt the sadness this year. It seemed like it just snuck up on me, too. I am sure my time in tent city and finals in school probably helped that situation, though. But people everywhere just didn't seem to have "it" this year...I suppose it's the economy -- and personally, most certainly, my situation with my children and the "splitting" of their time with their dad in addition to the very large void that losing my dad has left in my heart -- it just wasn't nearly as jovial as it has been in the past.
That said -- my family is just plain awesome. The boys made out like the spoiled little lovebugs they are (and I'm happy that they are)... I am still at peace with Joel which is so comforting. He will forever be in my life because of the beautiful creations we brought into this universe with God's blessing, therefore we must get along. Justin and I are still going strong -- strong enough that the ring is back on my finger and life is changing in a positive direction. Our relationship has grown. We will continue to have issues (what relationship doesn't) but I am starting to really believe that this is truly a good thing for me and the boys. I will patiently wait for my family to come around. I understand their doubt and they are entitled. However, I'm not in this relationship to prove anything. There is such freedom with that.
Speaking of my family, my mom is absolutely the rock of our family. She has an unbelievable way of exuberating grace and strength. I am so proud of her. She has kept our family together in some very difficult times. We may not always understand or agree, but our love for one another conquers all.
Anyway...just wanted to check in -- been too long....
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